Thursday, November 20, 2008

Kabillion My Eye


Joe is a soft spoken individual with dark complexion and pepper hair. He has this sense of quiet urgency about him. He is a thoughtful person who seems to choose his words carefully. 

"I set a goal to send out a kabillion stories this year," he said.

Okay. Not a kabillion, but over a hundred. I can't remember the number but maybe close to a kabillion. And it turns out those kabillion stories are a kabillion different stories. Some of them are being sent around to several publishers after a rejection. Still...a kabillion is a number to respect. It's the sort of number to rumble at while grabbing a crotch and glancing skyward.

I received this news from Joe and sneered. "Yeah? And how's that working out for you?"

"It's working out. I think I'm going to meet that goal."

"When is the year up?" I asked.

"December."

"I want in," I said.

Joe looked uneasily at me. We were suddenly standing under the hottest sun. A lone tumbleweed skipped with the breeze. I tilted my hat back and ran a hand across my brow.

"You want in?" he asked.

"I'm very competetive. Starting in January, we'll both do a kabillion stories."

"Kabillion and one," he said, squinting.

"Make it...Kabillion and one," I agreed.

Sonovabitch. 

So Duotrope and Ralans....look out. Starting in January the old Jew is going on a rampage, no market too small, no market too large. I've got a kabillion stories to push, and every step of the way that soft spoken pepper haired writer is going to be trying to beat me, pushing himself. Pushing me. Thank god I have a reservoir of work to polish and upgrade. Still.  A kabillion and one...that's serious. And I have a novel to finish by April.

Jon? You want in? 

15 comments:

Joe Ponepinto said...

Pzzzzzzzzz . . . click. The hammer is cocked. Oiled, cold steel slips smartly into worn leather. A boot heel grinds against the hard scrabble of Storytown. Fingers flex in the hot breeze. Ready when you are, Tex . . .

Angie said...

A kabillion and one, huh? You gonna do regular updates, let us know how that goes? :)

I keep telling myself I'm going to submit more stories. Of course I have to write more submittable stories first.... [rueful smile]

Angie

Charles Gramlich said...

Yep, you're insane. This post proves it. As if some of your earlier posts didnt? But I wish you well in meeting your goal.

Steve Buchheit said...

For some reason the Blue Brothers playing "Rawhide" is going through my head.

spyscribbler said...

My goal is to write a kabillion novels in my lifetime. I might settle for a kabillion 50K novellas, but I don't think so. I want a kabillion 100K novels.

Okay, make that a kabillion and one.

Virginia Lady said...

Nothing like shooting for the moon, huh? Good luck. I'm inspired. Maybe I'll try too. Or not. :-) I'm not that ambitious, I'll just work on getting my three completed works out.

aubreii said...

Hmmm. I seem to remember the amount being 200. Regardless, listening to the two of you cowboys exchange words was inspiring. Submit!!

Stewart Sternberg said...

Squinty eyes, Joe. Cheroot burning. I'm ready.

Angie, I gotta say this. If you don't submit, you don't get published. Even if you are only getting moderate attention on a website, at least its something.

Charles. You say insane like it's a bad thing.

Rawhide, Steve? That always makes me think of boots and fishnet.

spy, that's a lot of books. That's more than I can picture with glasses on.

Sweet Virginia, thanks for the comment. The more the merrier. Shoot out at the OKAY corral.

aubreii..don't confuse matters with facts.

Angie said...

Stewart -- oh, absolutely. [nod] I'm still balancing my writing between the pro side and the amateur side, and getting benefits from both. But I hit a rut and couldn't write a word for the first nine months or so of this year :( so that's slowed me down quite a lot. I'm writing again, though, and had a story come out recently, which is cool.

I've been devoted to writing for Torquere since I was first published with them. They've taken everything I've sent them, which is awesome, but I'm thinking I need to branch out a bit. I know what to do to hit that target, and I love hitting every time I shoot, but I should also be pushing other boundaries.

Angie

PS -- gotta ask, did you deliberately set your blog so that comments are black-on-black, and therefore unreadable unless they're hilighted? Or is it just some weirdness in my settings...? [squint]

Stewart Sternberg said...

Angie, I'm a thinkin the problem with black on black is on your side of the screen.

Angie said...

Stewart -- weird. :/ This is the only blog that does that, so I have no clue what it might be. [ponder]

Angie

Rick said...

I'm with you on this, brother. Think big, win bigger.

But do you think a kabillion and one submissions is economical?

Mark Rainey said...

There are a kabillion markets out yonder that aren't worth submitting to, either. If even one of your kabillion isn't done justice, that might just be one too many.

Something to remember on your qwest. ;)

Aimless Writer said...

Interesting. And good luck!
Let us know when you reach one million, then a billion, then a trillion, then a quadrillion, quintillion, sextillion, septillion, octillion, googol, googolplex...um...I don't know where a Kabillion is but now I'm scared. Very scared. We may never see the Sternberg again...

Jon said...

As you know, my New Year starts on April 1st. Hell yes I'm in. Or at least I will be in the spring. Might have to file the serial numbers off of some past stuff and strip my blog, but hell yes.
(Angel Eyes squinted one last time and jerked the reigns. His nameless horse whinnied, turned and was off in a cloud of toner dust.)