Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Manly Man

There is something about manly men. You know the type, the guy's guy who can wear a mullet and make you believe his hair has integrity. He's the guy with the leathery skin that says: "Skin cancer...up yours!" Manly men, Gutsy guys, Sardonic Studs. These are the guys who can quote from lines from old broadcasts of "The A Team" without missing a beat. These are folk who argue with authority about who was more kick-ass: Charles Bronson, Chuck Norris, Jack Bauer, or Freddy Prince.

Without them, where would the Nascar industry be?

So to you pillars of crystallized testosterone, accept this news story from the Associated Press:


JERUSALEM - A man clad only in underwear and a T-shirt wrestled a wild leopard to the floor and pinned it for 20 minutes after the cat leapt through a window of his home and hopped into bed with his sleeping family.

Du Mosch's pet cat was in the bed with him at the time, along with his young daughter who had been frightened by a mosquito in her own room.

Shapira said the leopard was very weak when park rangers arrived at Du Mosch's home after the surprise late-night visit. He said nature officials would likely release it back into the wild.

Du Mosch said he probably would not have been able to control the big cat were it in better health. As a nature guide, he said, he was familiar with animals and did his best to hold down the leopard without harming it. He said he took it all in stride, "but the kids were excited."

Oh yeah...here's to you Du Mosch. Here's to you and to every man who ever put a little bit of toilet paper on his chin to stop the bleeding after a close shave. (pictured, an AP photo of vets examining the sedated animal hours later)

24 comments:

Lee said...

Oh my, I just slipped right off me seat Stewart!

Travis said...

I guess this isn't really the point, but my question is - there are leopards in Jerusalem?

SQT said...

I almost feel sorry for the cat. Imagine when he tries to explain this to all the other cats later. Dude, he sucker punched me. I swear!

spyscribbler said...

Wow! I had no idea it was possible to wrestle a leopard and not get eaten alive, LOL.

The leopard's a beauty, though!

Lucas Pederson said...

Craziness! Yeah, it was a good thing the leopard was ill, otherwise, well...dinner time. Or perhaps it was the house cat on the bed that spoke to the larger one. Perhaps it told the leapard to just lay still, make the man feel like a manly man, something to that extreme anyway.
Oh, you should take a stop by my blog. I posted a story focusing on economy. Not the economy, but story writing economy, just incase I wasn't clear enough. Anyway, I hope to see you there! Later!

Stewart Sternberg said...

Lee...this is inspiration. I'm touched. Moved.

Trav...Jerusalem also has grizzly bears but no one likes to talk about that. It's wrapped up with the whole "Noah" thing.

Feel sorry for that cat. Yes, I can understand that. It's a womanly response to the whole cuddle thing, isn't it, SQT?

Spyscribbler...AND HIS KIDS WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!!!!! According to DuMosch...tbey were "excited".

Thanks Lucas, I will check it out.

Fab said...

They showed it yesterday on the evening news. I just found it strange the news team was able to get there first before the animal rescue team arrived.

Kate S said...

Maybe the poor kitty just wanted to get in with everyone else too. I mean, he was in bed with the wife, kids and other cat - how did anyone get any sleep?

Stewart Sternberg said...

Fab, maybe the people at animal rescue just didn't believe it. As for the media...hey, this was just a case of good oldfashioned journalists covering a story that obviously affected the outcome of the Free World. Fer Goodness Sakes.

Kate, in some areas, like the community in which I live, people pay money to watch that sleeping arrangement. Did I just write that?

SQT said...

Feel sorry for that cat. Yes, I can understand that. It's a womanly response to the whole cuddle thing, isn't it, SQT?

Well, I'm not sure I'd cuddle a leopard.........

Sidney said...

Charles Bronson dug 17 tunnels.

avery said...

That man definitely deserves the John Wayne Award. No kid will ever beat his kids in the playground one-upmanship contest.

"My Dad is better than your dad."

"Oh yeah? My dad wrestled a leopard -- and won. What did your dad do?"

"You smell!"

Stewart Sternberg said...

Avery, you have to say: "My dad beat up a leopard....in his underwear." It's the underwear detail that makes the story.

Sidney, I knew you would say something like that.

SQT, I think we should do a posting on animals with which we would least like to cuddle. You know, like....bats...or crayfish.

Charles Gramlich said...

Wrestled a leopard in his underwear? A descendent of Tarzan no doubt.

SQT said...

SQT, I think we should do a posting on animals with which we would least like to cuddle. You know, like....bats...or crayfish.

Or spiders...*shiver*

That reminds me of that old Jim Stafford song "I don't like spiders and snakes."

DesLily said...

I've had some "close encounters" with "big cats" when I volunteered at Shambala Preserve in CA.. that cat musta been REALLY ILL for a man to subdue it till help arrived... matter a fact.. i can't even imagine it then!

hmmm, I don't suppose it was a trained cat?? nah... never mind

Stewart Sternberg said...

Charles, wouldn't Tarzan have just talked to the big cat or done something zen like that?

Working at Shamabla must have been very cool, offering plenty of memories. Is Shamabla the preserve which Tippi Hedren is associated with?

DesLily said...

Yes, it's owned and operated by Tippi. She opens the place one weekend a month for tours. (that cost of course) It's non profit since it costs a fortune to feed the animals and have Vetrinary care. I loved helping out. I was fortunate, in that I got some one on one (in the cage) time with a young Cougar named Daisy. Other than the handlers no one really got to do that, so I was lucky that way. I have an old website with some pics I took "way back then" of some of the animals at Shambala.. http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Bungalow/6687/Shambala.html

There are many more animals now, and many of those in MY photo's are gone.. but not Daisy!

avery said...

"Waaaak!" Peck.

That was all I could think of whenever the name Tippi Hendren was brought up (now I can finally picture her out helping animals, instead).

That bird on a string has to be one of the classic funny moments of film. That, and the entirety of The Exorcist.

miller580 said...

I read somewhere that the Cheetah must have a successful kill after one or two hunts or it will die of starvation because of the amount of energy it exudes in the chase. And that after eating it would lie around and sleep until it was time to hunt again.

But this is a leopard not a cheetah...yet it's still a lazy cat though.

etain_lavena said...

OOOO my word....
have a good weekend:)
hugz:)

Jon said...

You quoted Hemingway a few posts back. I can just see his take on this...the safari client and his wife jumped in bed by a leopard while the great white hunter sleeps. Just like Hemingway's, "The short Happy Life..." except there the great white hunter gets jumped in his bed by the wife of the client.

DonkeyBlog said...

About 10 years ago, a self-proclaimed martial arts expert, completely whacked-out on speed, hid in the Melbourne Zoo until after closing time. he then broke into the lion enclosure and tried his stuff ... and was completely torn apart. They closed the enclosure for days but could not get close enough to rescue the dude's remains as the lions were being very protective of their rotting carcus.

Pretty manly hey!

Stewart Sternberg said...

Donkey...Good for the lions. Coming from Michigan in the U.S., it's good to hear about a group of Lions who actually win. And besides, this clearly needed to happen to save the gene pool. Did he have a mullet?

Jon, 'The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber"..I have always thought this was one of his finest stories. A little misogynistic, but then, we're talking Hemingway.

Etain, good to see you. I am glad you didn't take too long a sabbatical from the web. Kate, I hope you aren't gone too long, eiter.

Avery, we're going to have to talk some time about The Exorcist. I think you are being too hard on that film.