Saturday afternoon. I'm not going to get too serious here. However, the other night I watched a dvd of Rod Stewart's last concert with The Faces. We're talking seventies here, as Rod's solo career was taking off. You know: "Maggie May," "Every Picture Tells A Story". The film quality was horrible, the sound sucked. If you want to watch a decent concert video, stay away from this one.
However, the one thing that amazed me was Rod Stewart's Butt. Notice it deserves its own capitalization. I had never seen him in concert, and as I watched him prance on stage, I was awed by the number of butt shots. I mean, several times through the concert, he actually turned his back to the audience, bent over and wiggled it, keeping the moon going for an amazing period of time. I half expected him to put a microphone up to his derrière and start singing through his sphincter.
I guess the emphasis of butt was for the benefit of the ladies. I must admit they responded well to the various wiggles, grinds, flexes, etc. However, as a fan of rock, I found myself mongoose mesmerized. I tried to imagine Meatloaf doing such moves. It hurt me. I tried picturing David Bowie giving butt. More pain. What about Ozzi Osborne? I went blind. Lar's from Metallica? I've lost a slice of my life. Bono? NO!!!!
The only other male performer whose butt received such attention was George Micheal (I could mention Marilyn Manson's butt, but I don't think that one counts) . Of course, George wore tight fitting jeans. Rod wore bright yellow jumpsuits and tartan scarves. We could mention Prince here, but Prince's Butt never seemed to take center stage like George's and Rod's.
Some of you will doubtless be asking: Why were you looking at Rod Stewart's Butt in the first place. Well, because it was there. And it sang. It even did harmonies.